On digital relationship - Feb 2024 IndieWeb Carnival

Nota: I wrote this a week ago but since I’ve been hesitant to actually publish it. Not sure if it’s because of it is so far from what I usually publish on that post, if it is “too personal” (even though it really isn’t that much) or for another reason… But here it is^^.

Nota2: If you are following this blog for the technical related articles, you can definitely skip this one :).

IndieWeb Carnival?

A first for me, but this month I’m participating in the IndieWeb carnival. If you don’t know what it is, the website explains it well:

[…]At the beginning of the month, the host comes up with the topic, and posts it both on their website[…]. Then, other people post their submissions and alert the host about them.[…] – https://indieweb.org/indieweb-carnival

So in a nutshell, the host (this month Manuel Moreale) choose a topic and anyone can participate by writing a related post. The topic of this month is about Digital Relationships. A very different topic for this blog, and an article I would have normally published more on my gemini capsule than here… But I thought it might be “fun” to get out of my “comfort zone” and try something different. I’m not saying I’m going to participate every month (definitely not!), but I was inspired by this month topic.

A few participants I enjoyed reading that shows the topic can go in many directions:

• Manuel Moreale own entry
• Ben Werdmuller entry
• Sara Jaksa entry
• Andrew Zuckerman
• VHB

For what it’s worth, I do believe that a similar idea for the gemini space would be a good idea as well… But that’s off topic for this post.

(My) Early relationship with the web

I was born in the mid 80s and grew up in the 90s, I’m part of that generation raised without the Internet and massive computer adoption and before (non smart) mobile phones… Which means I had the luck of discovering all of these and in particular the early web era! I may not have been in the first ones, but as a teenager I could go online (mostly at night because it was using the home phone line and thus made the phone (and fax machine, yes we had one of those) unusable while being online).

During my teenage years, I browsed a bit BBSs, but I mainly spent time either on <blink>-ing (and <marque>-ing) websites and in a few chatrooms. First on ICQ, and later I discovered MSN and more importantly IRC. The later became my number one chat system and I still use it to this day (granted now I’m more often than not using a matrix bridge). I even used a few times the (in)famous (in France) caramail chat. I wasn’t very active but was joining these chats from time to time.

Fast forwarding to my college days, got a 24/7 ADSL connection and the real joy of browsing the web grew. I started my gnu/linux journey and discovery of opensource, development, web technologies, etc… and selfhosting of course… My story about how I started my selfhosting journey by hosting my first home made website (in php) on a MS Windows desktop running WAMP is for another time, but this lead me to join various IRC channels about manga (subject of the site) and / or tech.

During these years, I was talking with many people on IRC, and I’m still talking to a handful of them that I have never met in person after years of chats. Some people think it is impossible to have meaningful exchanges / relationships with other without seeing each other, but I disagree. It is even sometime better to talk to people you don’t see, some topics are easier that way. Yes written communication are more complex because some information can not be shared (body language, tone - in particular irony and sarcasm, …), but that doesn’t prevent people to find a way to interact that works for them and create true companionship, friendship or more. I indeed saw couple getting together thanks to IRC channels!

From Digital to IRL

I could almost stop there, talking about some 100% digital relationships with people I’ve never met, but I also met people IRL after extensive chatting. Circa 2007/2008(?), after hosting my first site about manga, I got contacted by the person running the site gaara-fr.com back then, a website about Naruto, and other websites. I became webmaster of other dedicated manga (Bleach, Fairy Tail and Death Note) sites and all that became the “manga france network” with a very active French speaking forum about manga. Later on, it became scantrad.net that is now closed as well.

I’ll write another post one day about this someday, but long story short is: the community grew thanks to a very large forum and a very living IRC channel. The team grew a lot as well, it was the golden age of scantrad, so the team was composed of webmasters, translators, cleaners and editors, moderators, and many others… A big team that was talking day and night together on forums and/or IRC about manga and everything else possible too (on a private IRC channel).

Every year in France there is a big manga related event called “Japan Expo”. It was not as big as it is now, but was already a large event. We decided to met each others during that event, spending the day, evening and night together. People from everywhere in France and some from Belgium! The event itself wasn’t great (never been a fan of these type of events more built towards making you buy stuff than anything else), but meeting with these people was enough to enjoy the day. The next year we did it again and even ditched the event in the early afternoon to just go somewhere between us. We became good friends and many of us saw each other again many times during many years. In small or bigger groups. Multiple couple was made from this.

Out of these people, I became very good friend with 2 of them, and the 3 of us co-founded a company together! Granted it lasted only 2 years, but it does show the level of trust that was built from, at the beginning, a simple common passion (in this case manga) that brought us in the same digital space… and willingness to have endless discussions too. The company itself wasn’t a success (we were 3 dumb inexperienced students), but going through it was a interesting experience I still think about from time to time.

Conclusion

I remember very fondly of these years, events and relationships. And even though I lost contact with most (but not all!) of these people, I would be very happy to be contacted by any of them. If you happen to recognized me here (I still the same username, 20 years after!), feel free to reach out (see the About page) :).

Thanks Manuel Moreale that brought back a lot of these old memories with a simple yet fun topic for this month IndieCarnival!